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I'm not a person who is easily offended. I love a good racist, gay or dead baby joke but people who aren't joking make me about eighteen degrees of uncomfortable.

I was at work today having break with a couple co-workers. The two ladies are obviously friends. They both live in the country a smidge outside of Rochester and are middle aged.

A: Did you see the new benefits updates?

B: No

A: They now have a plan where you and your spouse can just be insured instead of having the whole family plan, its cheaper.

B: Oh...probably spouse or "partner" she said the word like it might infect her with gay-disease.

A: Of course(groans and rolls eyes) What's next?

I was pissed. I wanted to stand up and act like I didn't notice their sarcasm... Whats next? Hopefully gay marriage I would say, hopefully couples not afraid to hold hands on the street or kiss at a table on valentines day. Then spurt off on how its so wonderful that we work for a place that has such benefits because other people aren't as lucky.

I didn't, I sat staring down at my oatmeal.

Now I probably wouldn't be quite as keyed up if this was the first incident. However only weeks earlier the same two and a nurse were in the break room as a news story came on about the recent approval of gay marriage in California.

The ladies squirmed. Saying that's just not right, and I hope it never comes here. Going on to joke how they would never be caught dead going to a gay wedding.

True they aren't saying all gays should be killed or anything but the obvious disregard to homosexual relationships really razzes me. I was willing to let the marriage thing slide since it is a newishly and hot topic but just blatantly throwing their disgust into a conversation about health care seems very unnecessary.

Should I have said something? Probably...and next time
I will. I doubt I will change any minds but at best I will get them to mind their P's and Q's around me and at worst I'll be labeled as that "queer girl" its a label I can live with.

Photo: From Slap Upside the Head

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  • Anonymous Smiley says so:
    6:21 PM  

    I had a similar expierence at breakfast the other day with co-workers. They were talking about transexuals and how its just not right for a male to switch to female or whatever. I spoke up right away and said you have no idea what it would be like to be bon a girl but totally have the brain of a man. I said people kill themselves over it because they feel they can't do anything about it. I made sure they knew that they really had no clue what it was like. People are so closed minded. top

  • Blogger Jennifer says so:
    6:44 PM  

    Speaking up is sometimes very difficult - especially in your place of employment. Sometimes speaking up isn't

    That said, I'm on my partner's health insurance at your place of employment and I couldn't be happier.

    You know what that insurance covers? 50% on reproductive costs, and 90%-100% on prenatal, labor and delivery. We're having our second child in January. We're a big GAY family, covered wholly by their insurance. Tell them to put that in their pipe and smoke it. :)

    PS- Cheers to you, Smiley, for speaking your mind. top

  • Blogger Ava Mazur says so:
    9:16 PM  

    Thanks ladies for not stoneing me for not speaking up. I think if it does occur again I will play blonde to thier opinions and state my opposing opinion. Stay tuned with two instances in a couple weeks Im sureit wont be long until I haveanother blog on the topic. top

  • Blogger Angel says so:
    5:44 PM  

    I am completely embarrassed that ppl are like that. But at the same time I remember being that way a few years ago when I was trying to ignore who I really am. I even touted that God had saved me from a life of sin by taking away my homosexual urges. Well when I stopped hiding myself and accepted who I really am I finally came out to my mom as Bi. And I am proud to work for a company that provides benefits for same sex domestic partner. top

  • Anonymous alice says so:
    1:46 AM  

    you eat oatmeal? top

  • Blogger Ava Mazur says so:
    1:50 PM  

    Good question alice! My instant oatmeal is part of my stop eating things that are totally bad for me attempt. I admit the oatmeal was shocking but I have been choking down the glue for the last few days. top