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Puke-a-poluza

I must preface this story with a little flashback to two days ago. Ed and I had gone grocery shopping because we had no edible food left in the house. Before putting our new goodies into their ice-box home I thought it appropriate to clean out the fridge especially since its pungent odor filled the kitchen whenever it was opened. So Im going through and tossing things left and right. For some reason I paused at a rotisserie chicken from last nightI had no intention of eating it and began to throw it away saying, Do you think this is good? First of all I should never ask a boy that question they will eat anything. Ben begs me to keep it and to appease him I put the icky chicken back into my clean fridge to finish its decay.

Fast forward two days later. I am coming home from the gym Ed had the day off and I call him to tell him when Im going to be home so he can start dinner. Ben answers the phone groan groan, I cant even think about food right now. Oh gag I think his lazy ass has been home all day and he cant even put a freakin lasagna in the oven. But I am nice and let it go saying Ill start it when I get home. I come in the door to find him laying in bedcomplaining. At this point I am operating under the assumption that he is just being a big baby.

But I am the nice girlfriend to so go to Walmart (land of the ugly) to get some Saltines, Pepto and 7up. I come home and Ben is in the bathroomoh the noises that came out of that room I feared the door might blow off. So I eat dinner and let him work it outpoor Ben has not left the bathroom and I am starting to think he might be legitimately sick.

After about 45minutes of his bathroom exile he calls me in. He looks like shit and is panicking. His face is pale his lips are blue he cant feel his arms or legs and is starting to pass out. (Okay so he really was sick how was I supposed to know he wasnt just being a baby.STOP JUDGING ME!) So it takes about 20 minutes to get him into the car and to the hospital. They take us right in. We are in the evaluation room and Ben is trying to tell me something.I have absolutely no clue what he is saying. So I just say dont worry honey we are at the hospital theyll take care of you....you know all that sensitive crap I only pull out when absolutely necessary.

Ed: Mummble mumble mumble

Me: What honey?

Ed: Mummble mumble mumble

Me: Oh yeah hon I love you too. (have no clue what he is saying)

Ed: Mummble mumble puke mumble.

Me: Puke? Oh God he has to Puke!?

The nurse hands me a small bucket like a big cup really like the size of a large fountain soda cup, I put it in front of his face and ....OH MY GOD. Now I have seen people puke before but this was quite a forceful blast out the mouth out the nose, its splashing all over my hands. Ed filled two and a half of those cups. I was yelling at the nurse I NEED ANOTHER BUCKET! QUICKLY! Oh and it was pink..with chunks it must have been that pepto.

So what have I learned? You know you really love someone when you clean the toilet after they have had water-poop for 45minutes and held ridiculously small buckets when they are vomiting and it doesnt even faze you...yes children that is lwhat love is all about. Oh and I even didnt rub it in his face (too much) that I wanted to throw that chicken away in the first place.

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